Anupama Nair
www.mediaeyenews.com
If you have an important meeting with your client or you are on a date, if you want it to be a success, “you need to carry an impressive personality on your sleeves”. Personality has now become an often-used word in our language. It is that physical-yet-undefined feature that defines your success. However, what is personality and can we define it?
“Personality is a characteristic way of thinking, feeling, and behavior”. A research study conducted by psychologists from the University of Illinois in USA suggest that “we can change our personality traits if we want to change them”.
If you want to become the best version of yourself, it is possible, though it might not be easy. It might be a version that “echoes confidence, enthusiasm, and serenity and the kind that makes you stand out and help you get whatever you want in life. The question you might ask – “is there a formula to develop a personality that you dream”?
What are the tips to develop a great personality?
Know you are incomparable
The first and foremost step in developing a great personality is that you need to be confident in your own skin. How can you do that? You should never compare yourself with others. The continuous comparing blocks your own strengths and the other person has more strength than you in your own head. However, the blessed and often unrealized truth is that you are unique and incomparable. Sri. Sri. Ravi Shankar said that the “uniqueness of every person must be celebrated”.
“There came a time when you were required on this planet and hence you were sent. Let us be the best we can be. Don’t miss yourself and let the world not miss you. In the history of the universe, there has been nobody like you and to the infinite of time to come, there will be no one like you. Existence should have loved you so much that it broke the mold after making you, so that another of your kind will never get repeated. You are original. You are rare. You are unique. You are a wonder. You are a masterpiece. Celebrate your uniqueness,” stated the great Indian Guru.
Be kind to yourself
Recent studies reveal that self-compassion brings positive traits like “optimism, self-confidence, wisdom, happiness, positivity and resilience”. According to Emma Seppala, a research psychologist at Stanford University in USA, “self-compassion includes three steps – “recognize that you deserve care and concern like anyone else and that is why you must be kind and understanding with yourself, recognize that making mistakes and failing is a part of life, do not be hard on yourself when you commit a mistake or fail and indulge in self-critical thoughts”. Be aware of your emotions and feelings. Contrary to popular belief, self-compassion however, does not mean letting yourself off the hook, but, it means taking corrective action, albeit without being too self-critical.
“Give space to imperfection”
Imperfections always worry us so much so that getting agitated easily becomes a habit, and being grumpy assumes a personality trait as we grow older. However, we all know that people who are more relaxed or, ‘chilled out’, live more happily and easily charm people with their ‘relaxed vibes’. In order to feel cooler in your skin and vibes, it is important to be able to give room to imperfections. However, not always, the people around you, situations you find yourself in, and your own personality have to be the way you want them to be all the time”.
Think like a leader
Who is a leader? “Leadership is an action, not a position” They are people who take responsibilities without waiting for someone else to give it to them. It is said “ a leader is one who knows the way, goes the way and shows the way”. For example, the lives of famous leaders like Netaji Subhash Chandra Bose and Bhagat Singh reveal the leadership traits.
Be light in mind and heart
When you are light in the mind and heart, it reflects in your behavior with others. People also feel light in your company. One of the ways to be able to feel that way is to not overthink or over-analyze. Don’t let any negativity like “shame, anger, jealousy or greed stay in your behavior for too long. Always learn to take it easy, forgive easily and drop grudges against people as soon as they pop up. You also feel happy from within, and who does not like happy people?
Stay Enthusiastic
Enthusiasm is a positive trait. What is enthusiasm? “Enthusiasm is nothing but great eagerness to be involved in a particular activity that you like and enjoy or that you think is important”. Being enthusiastic always makes your everyday tasks more enjoyable, and it attracts people towards you. Everybody likes to see a person full of enthusiasm. What is the source of enthusiasm you might ask? The answer would be “meditation helps one feel enthusiastic, calm and composed at the same time”.
Be a better communicator
A poetry in Kannada says that “words can create laughter and can also create enmity”. A skillful communicator can win over people and adverse situations. So, bring clarity in your communication.
Be approachable
We all like people with whom we can easily mingle with and talk to. No one likes a person who responds with a straight face. So be warm. Flash that smile more often. Be friendly and be ready to share and help.
Learn to let go
After you’re done with a task, let go of your attachment with the result. When you let go, you become free, calm and relaxed that is the attribute needed for a strong personality. For instance, the Bhagavad Gita asks us to do karma and not worry about the result.
Stay calm with the power of breath
Being calm strengthens one’s personality. However, staying calm can be difficult when you have a terrible headache and have an urgent deadline to meet. In such situations, tap the power of breath. Awareness of your breath can help you find calm amidst any situation.
When you have a deadline and you are stressed, which causes a headache, how do you relax, yoga or meditation definitely helps.
Inspiring.